Just got booted from water taxi for showing my balls to a security guard.
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
i am craving dick and cupcakes
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
Randomize
