But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
Randomize