Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
Randomize
