Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
I'm drunk in f*****g wisconsin and want to kill myself.
If it's any consolation, be grateful that you're not in New Jersey.
come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
When I'm drunk i like to pretend my penis is zeus and instead of peeing i'm throwing lightning bolts into the toilet...it helps me focus.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Randomize
