You were right, I'm so drunk and I want to eat the shit out of my vanilla cupcake candle it smells delish
Experience is the best teacher
I puked a lego.
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
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