hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
You are a booty call, not a friend.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
Dude. I’m playing chess through iMessage with a stripper. What has my life become.
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
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