paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
Randomize
