My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
I'm chasing vodka with french fries.
I have a running excel spreadsheet detailing the number of shots in a night and subsequent ability to masturbate
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
Randomize
