Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
It was around the time I started requesting "big girl straws" from the bartender for my jack and diets, that I knew I'd probably wake up with my sunglasses on and find my wallet in the shower.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
Randomize
