dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
I remember reading the word "lift" so I did. The alarn went off, and I thought to myself "what dumbass pulls the fucking fire alarm?" and then I realized it was me...
Randomize
