I called the bartender Mr. Intoxication last night. He thought it was funny until i threw up and blamed it on him
my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
Randomize
