Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
He’s going to a lawnmower race. I got a Brazilian and he’s racing a lawnmower race. Pick me up. I’m not wasting this waxing on John Deer
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