ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
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