i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
Randomize
