Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
Randomize
