OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
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