I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
I was lying there too hungover to move when my dog jumped onto my bed and set half a calzone on my pillow. Best. Dog. Ever.
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
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