I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
I need mimosas to revive my soul
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize
