It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
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