her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
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