If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
Less talking, more tequila
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
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