I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
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