but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
Randomize
