He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
life lesson #1: a fart during an awkward silence between 2 strangers doesnt make it less awkward.
I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
Randomize
