I think im going to throw up on grandma
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
Randomize
