i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
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