you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
He caught a cramp during sex and I was like "do you want me to get you a banana?" And he responded with "I'll give you a banana" and kept going. I'm marrying him.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
Randomize
