It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
Randomize