wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
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