Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
Drunk in my hotel room, eating taco bell, and crying at Nicki Minaj's life story.
This is why I keep you in my life.
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
