At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
Randomize
