im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
My butt remains clenched, sir.
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Randomize