Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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