I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
Ambien. No doubt about it.
OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
Randomize
