its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
Randomize
