she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
I distinctly remember calling the anesthesiologist a "sneaky little bastard" directly to his face
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
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