margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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