Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
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