Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
Randomize