I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
Randomize