Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
Taylor Swift is so right about you.
it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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