So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
You're a hot mess, you know that?
At least I'm a FUN hot mess. Like a train crash full of pizza, fireworks and glitter.
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
Randomize
