The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
im calling her cock vulture from now on
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
I need a new best friend. Someone who drinks like a fish, hooks up enough to raise eyebrows, and isn't afraid to admit that masturbation is the second best way to spend time. Someone like me! Help me put up posters.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
