it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
i think my cat just said my name.
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
