Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Randomize
