Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
He told me his condom was going to expire tomorrow and he needed to use it. I can't believe I fell for it.
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
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