My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
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