hotel room ftw
just ate pastrami before passing out in my hotel room. My room smells like a petting zoo
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
my dad is drunk dialing our relatives who are stuck in a blizzard asking them to pick up sun tan lotion for him cause hes too drunk to drive to the store.
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
Randomize
