having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
What changed your mind?
Being sober
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
Your shirt... Was in my pants
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
Randomize
