I bet he comes in French.
I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Randomize
