No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
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