I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
Where were you when I was single???
Still in diapers.
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
Guess who just set half their backyard on fire.
Please tell me youre joking.
Nope. on the brightside though, im really gonna quit smoking this time.
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Randomize
